197
Calibrating the Body
body? Is something physically uncomfortable distracting you? Do you perceive any tight or sore
spots anywhere? Can you describe your current bodily experience with one ‘quality adjective’ (e.g.
relaxed, cold, tingly, taut, soft, foggy and centred – be aware of not yet crossing from physical sensations to emotional qualities, stay with a descriptor rather than an interpretation of it).
It would not be surprising if, during the above exploration, the last invitation was diffcult.
Concrete physiological feedback of our bodily functions is strongly intertwined with our perception of that feedback. In neuroscience, this phenomenon is called ‘interoception’ (interior perception). Physical sensations play an important part in our moods, emotions, behaviour and sense of
well-being – including gut feelings and heartache (Cameron and Hamilton, 2002; Wiens, 2005).
Becoming even more familiar with these interconnections further enables us to discern shifts and
fuctuations around us.
Zoom in on one quality from your previous inquiry, and observe any interpretations, judgements, feelings or emotions related to it. You might notice a sense of familiarity and recognition (‘I
always feel like this after lunch’) or a new internal awareness (‘wow, I haven’t noticed that before’).
Observe if it has to do with the state of your body (pleasant or unpleasant), or with what you are
doing (engaging or boring). Is it a state you are comfortable with, or want to ‘move away from’?
Try, however, to accept and receive it as it is, without changing anything. There is no right or
wrong. There also does not have to be a concrete outcome. Just try to follow the interrelationships
between your physical sensations and your mental and emotional state. You might, for example,
perceive coldness in your hands and feet, a slow digestive system and perhaps a lack of concentration or disinterest in what you are doing. 12
TERRITORY OF THE HEART AND EMOTIONAL LITERACY
I use the term ‘emotional literacy’ for the ability to navigate feelings and emotions without ‘drowning’
in them, ‘acting them out’ or projecting them onto others. It requires skill to hold the wildness and
tenderness of our heart without numbing, ignoring or unhelpfully amplifying its voice. Usually, this
literacy matures with conscious attention to personal growth and/or spiritual practice. However,
there are a few specifc ingredients to consider that are largely ignored in western education. Four
are briefy explored here.
First of all, emotional literacy includes not only the acceptance of uncertainty and not knowing, but also acknowledging such states and experiences as fertile and creative. Although it takes
courage to enter the unknown, this is the place where we expand our knowledge (see also Ellis,
2009; Melrose, 2007). Pedagogically, we learn best when we are slightly, but not too far, out of our
comfort zone; otherwise, we are either under- or overstimulated, and neither is conducive to growth
and learning.
Secondly, emotional literacy includes recognition of, and fuidity around, ambiguity and paradoxes. We are often taught something is either this or that; it cannot be both. Learning from a
quantum landscape, we know that the universe contains particles and waves. Can we similarly grow
towards and/and inclusivity rather than either/or exclusivity in our emotional landscape?
Thirdly, emotional literacy enhances the ability to deal with apparent failure in case of so-called
mistakes. We live in a culture that rewards success and celebrates fast achievers. However, not (yet)
knowing something often means that we are learning. Can we accept that making mistakes is a
natural part of being human, and treat them with humour and compassion and as part of our learning trajectory?
Finally, emotional literacy acknowledges our inherent vulnerability and ultimate mortality and
aims to fnd our peace with that. How can we integrate inevitable change and death without becoming paralysed with fear? How can this contribute to a positive and conscious use of our life force?
12 ‘Focussing’ is a psychotherapeutic process developed by Eugene Gendlin to explore the ‘felt sense’ of internal knowing,
to increase awareness of (often preverbal) responses to life situations (Gendlin, 1978).
Calibrating the Body
body? Is something physically uncomfortable distracting you? Do you perceive any tight or sore
spots anywhere? Can you describe your current bodily experience with one ‘quality adjective’ (e.g.
relaxed, cold, tingly, taut, soft, foggy and centred – be aware of not yet crossing from physical sensations to emotional qualities, stay with a descriptor rather than an interpretation of it).
It would not be surprising if, during the above exploration, the last invitation was diffcult.
Concrete physiological feedback of our bodily functions is strongly intertwined with our perception of that feedback. In neuroscience, this phenomenon is called ‘interoception’ (interior perception). Physical sensations play an important part in our moods, emotions, behaviour and sense of
well-being – including gut feelings and heartache (Cameron and Hamilton, 2002; Wiens, 2005).
Becoming even more familiar with these interconnections further enables us to discern shifts and
fuctuations around us.
Zoom in on one quality from your previous inquiry, and observe any interpretations, judgements, feelings or emotions related to it. You might notice a sense of familiarity and recognition (‘I
always feel like this after lunch’) or a new internal awareness (‘wow, I haven’t noticed that before’).
Observe if it has to do with the state of your body (pleasant or unpleasant), or with what you are
doing (engaging or boring). Is it a state you are comfortable with, or want to ‘move away from’?
Try, however, to accept and receive it as it is, without changing anything. There is no right or
wrong. There also does not have to be a concrete outcome. Just try to follow the interrelationships
between your physical sensations and your mental and emotional state. You might, for example,
perceive coldness in your hands and feet, a slow digestive system and perhaps a lack of concentration or disinterest in what you are doing. 12
TERRITORY OF THE HEART AND EMOTIONAL LITERACY
I use the term ‘emotional literacy’ for the ability to navigate feelings and emotions without ‘drowning’
in them, ‘acting them out’ or projecting them onto others. It requires skill to hold the wildness and
tenderness of our heart without numbing, ignoring or unhelpfully amplifying its voice. Usually, this
literacy matures with conscious attention to personal growth and/or spiritual practice. However,
there are a few specifc ingredients to consider that are largely ignored in western education. Four
are briefy explored here.
First of all, emotional literacy includes not only the acceptance of uncertainty and not knowing, but also acknowledging such states and experiences as fertile and creative. Although it takes
courage to enter the unknown, this is the place where we expand our knowledge (see also Ellis,
2009; Melrose, 2007). Pedagogically, we learn best when we are slightly, but not too far, out of our
comfort zone; otherwise, we are either under- or overstimulated, and neither is conducive to growth
and learning.
Secondly, emotional literacy includes recognition of, and fuidity around, ambiguity and paradoxes. We are often taught something is either this or that; it cannot be both. Learning from a
quantum landscape, we know that the universe contains particles and waves. Can we similarly grow
towards and/and inclusivity rather than either/or exclusivity in our emotional landscape?
Thirdly, emotional literacy enhances the ability to deal with apparent failure in case of so-called
mistakes. We live in a culture that rewards success and celebrates fast achievers. However, not (yet)
knowing something often means that we are learning. Can we accept that making mistakes is a
natural part of being human, and treat them with humour and compassion and as part of our learning trajectory?
Finally, emotional literacy acknowledges our inherent vulnerability and ultimate mortality and
aims to fnd our peace with that. How can we integrate inevitable change and death without becoming paralysed with fear? How can this contribute to a positive and conscious use of our life force?
12 ‘Focussing’ is a psychotherapeutic process developed by Eugene Gendlin to explore the ‘felt sense’ of internal knowing,
to increase awareness of (often preverbal) responses to life situations (Gendlin, 1978).